Blogville,I’ so so sorry for all my sins.For absconding with all the wealth of knowledge and fun you gave to me to putting up a meager 1 post per month.I’ve sinned against heaven and before thee.I’m no longer worthy to be called a blogger.Please forgive me.I accept blogspot as my e-lord and personal screen saver.Let my URL name be written in the blog of life.AMEN!
People I’m so excited and thrilled to be back for shizzle.My fingers keep fidgeting from fever-pitch excitement as I type this post.No more 1post per month.I’ve decided against all odds to be active.I wasn’t happy seeing my comments drop from 40 to 7!I’d b glad if you read and comment my previous posts.Anywais,to the gist of the week,my cousin got married 2weeks ago but his mom supposed this is the time when their bodies would be at “boiling point” and they would be letting out the heat just about anywhere in the crib-in the kitchen,the floor,the toilet,on the TV,in the ceiling,on the generator LOL so she sent me over to live with them in other to spoil their show lol(just kidding) ANywais,I’m staying with them in the meantime.Lastweek my cousin asked me to go get fuel but there was(is) fuel scarcity so I combed the area in search of fuel but I ended up walking around aimlessly.Eventually an okada man who presumed me to be in search of fuel cos I carried a plastic jerrycan approached me and told me he knows where I can get fuel but he would charge me 300naira for transport to and fro.I agreed.Lets call this okada man fineboy agbero.Not quite 10secs into the ride he began to talk.
FBA said next time I cant get fuel I should ask an okada man cos they know “everywhere”.It’s no news that when you lose your way in Lagos you ask an okada man for help cos he definitely knows your destination but FBA gave me a startling insight to what he meant by “everywhere”.He said if I want to buy human head,freshly cut breast or any human body part he can take me to a shop in Ikeja where they are sold.I asked unbelievably “in this broad daylight afternoon?!” He replied yes!I asked how he got to know the place and he informed me in this transportation business you meet all sorts of persons going to different kind of places.FBA said he charges nothing less than 6,000naira for a trip to d “body shop”.He also said at times his passengers are robbers going on a mission.He said a particular thief he carried showed him his pistol and warned him not to stop if any police officer signaled him to otherwise he would blow his ass out!
FBA was hissing as he recounted his experiences to me.He said and I quote “okada no b beta job”.HE makes nothing less than 3,500naira each day but he comes across a lot of mind boggling things he wants to change his job.Not too long ago he picked up this pretty looking hiply dressed chic.Half way into the ride the girl started rubbing her breasts on his back and put her hands on his penis.Old papa wey neva kpansh for like 6years,he lost control of the bike,his whole body was sexually charged.That is another class of passengers he comes across.Girls that don’t want to pay in cash but in kind for their transport fare.He said an average okada man gets quickies everyday from this girls in broad daylight!(charizard u might want to start this business o) They are the promiscuous type who practice “aristocrazy” on a base level.The rest of mankind trade with money they still practice trade by barter using their pussy as the means of exchange.
My ears where full I told him to stop cos I was afraid he would tell me he knows where obama’s babalawo resides.Hope y’all loved my comeback post.Yeah I got a blogger who is sort of new.please cheer her up shes never got a comment on her blog