Monday, December 15, 2008

KAMIKAZE(ADJ) part2

This is the 2nd part of the story I started prior2my disappearance but b4 u read this story I want u2FIRST predict the end of the story(if ur yet2read the story,go2d post titled kamikaze(adj) b4 u read this post)I noticed a psychological trend in the comments(which I will reveal later) That is why I want u2predict first so u dnt change ur mind after reading this post.The first part is stained with loads of grammatical errors and wrong spellings cos I rushed the story n also did no editing.
2MONTHS AFTER SEGUN'S DEPARTURE
Segun delayed his sleep for almost an hour so he cud be awake at 12am on the 9th of march 2008 to wish the love of his life a happy birthday and shock her with a surprise.Anxiously,he looks at his wristwatch for the umpteenth time but it said 11:58pm.He let out a loud sigh in exasperation...His eyes were drowsy.His muscles lazy.His kingsize bed exerted gravitational pull and seemed2call his name.It was somnambulistic.The 58mins had been grueling.The 2mins felt like forever."what the heck!"Segun snaped.He reseted his watch a minute and30seconds earlier.Satisfactorily,he stared at his Tag which then said 12am."Omo udon make me fall in love.U don make me fall in love" Victoria's phone rang but she was too buried in deep sleep by the weight of responsibilities and exhaustion."Omo udon make me fall in love" Victoria's phone rang again but the ringtone played in her dream a sweet music instead of waking her up.She smiled,turned her back2d phone,pedaled and slide a hand forward in a manner that seemed as if she clutched down,change gears and step on the gas,accelerating deeper in2sleep land.Segun was fraustrated.He felt like smashing his blackberry.He'd waited a grueling 60mins all for this?His bed held him.He couldn't resist anymore.He sets his alarm for3am.He had2b d first2call her.... "THIS IS SPARTA!!!" The alarm barked at Segun.Sluggishly,he gained consciousness.Slothfully,he called his wife.Drowsily,Victoria picked.Ecstatically,Segun spoke.Quickly,Victoria leaped2life shocked by whose online."Happy birthday dearie" Victoria smiled.She was touched.She loved this part of him.He was romantic its just that he is turn between work and home."How are u my queen?" "I'm fine,the kids are better" "Dmt talk bout the kids.2day is all4u" Segun interrupted."Awwh dats so sweet.I miss u" "Guess what?" Segun jumped in."Emm... ur coming home?" Victoria said sarcastically."How did u know?Yes I am"
“NO!U kid me right?” She said in excitement. “Seriously.I’m bringing myself as birthday gift.I’m coming with the afternoon flight” “AHHH!OH MY GUSH(3ce)” She shouted ecstatically.Her birthday couldn’t be any happier.She missed him.”Come pick me up at the airport at 3pm” “WOW!I’ll.Thats another 2hour drive but its worth it” “Awwh,I miss you dear.I miss you.I miss combing your hair with my fingers.I miss licking your earlobes.” They whispered beautiful nothings for the next hour.
Demola stepped in the house.It looked different-red and lovely.He could see joy-written in the air.It was like xmas.U need not be told its xmas with all the lightened trees,atmosphere and faces.”What is happening this Saturday morning” Hem mused.Victoria slid down the stairs and around the sitting room like a ballet.She winked at Demola to greet him.Her face was exceptionally bright.She still had her red night gown on and she sang “lady in red” to herself.Demola was puzzled but those intimidating breasts of Victoria’s jumped at him via the slightly transparent night gown.He’d lusted after them so so many times.He imagined his big ben between those twin towers.”Blood of Jesus!” He uttered snapping out of sin.We all have this “mojos” played in our minds at one time or the other.I think it’s a good thing we can’t see people’s thoughts.Gush,its so filthy and wicked!A sister sees a brother’s fallos protruding his trouser and her mind leaps to conjure all her mouth and hands can do with it.A dude sees a chair and he is transported via a time portal to what he did on the chair when sarah sat on his nail.But I think that’s the major difference between man and dogs.Dogs go on right ahead to fuck anything-including their mothers!Man,on the contrary has this resistor called common sense.It checks him.”Hey man,shes hot but shes ur friend’s aunt” “Hey girl,hes brad pitt but he is your sister’s”(for where?enough pple go still disobey this one o lol) Even the most pious men have these thoughts but I think its still within civility and morality when we contain these thoughts.
“Whats happening o?” Demola finally spoke.”Today is my birthday” “OH!My bad.I forgot” “And segun is leaving work to be with me today!” Victoria added gleefully.”Ehen.Nowonder” “I need to go change and go pick Segun.Heres some money please get lunch for the kids and yourself” At 1pm.Victoria called Segun who informed her he is on the way to the airport for his 1hour flight to Las gidi scheduled for 2pm.Excitement brimming in Victoria,she rushed to the airport.Its been an hour into her drive from Ajah to the airport.Now she is stuck in traffic on the 3rd mainland bridge.Shiana Twain’s “you are still the one” played on the radio.It was perfect.She reminisced.”Omo, udon make me fall in love” Victoria looks at the caller ID-True love.Its Segun.”Hello my love” She said gleefully like a kid handed a pack of candy.”Em…Hi” The voice on the other end of the line lacked the enthusiasm it carried at 3am that morning.”Whats the problem?” Victoria quizzed.”Em…There is a…em…problem at the office.Someone messed up and I must fix it if not the company would be in trouble with NCC.I can’t come to Lagos anymore.” Victoria was shattered.It was better he hadn’t made the promise.Tears dripped down her chics.She lost grip of herself.Her lips quivered.“Isn’t there any other way” Victoria asked helplessly.”You know if there is,I would” Segun sadly replied.Her phone dropped from her fidgeting fingers.The jeep decelerated till it came to a halt in the middle of the road.She buried her head in the steering wheel.The horn blasted away!”Hello!Hello!Are you there my love?” Segun cried.At that moment,Tracy Chapman’s “Sorry-sorry,is all that you can say….but you can say baby,baby can I hold you tonite” aired through the radio….

Monday, December 8, 2008

I'M BACK DOING ME!

NO LONG TIN!Blogville,baba is back!kilonshele?I've been gone4 2long im
afraid I can't catch up but I'll just jump the queue and join the
molue@this bus stop.It wasnt my intention2just leave but reality grabbed me away
from the virtual.4those of you who didn't ask after me,weldone o.Incognaija
I'm stupyfied.I didnt know u still read ma blog plus u dropped by on
me.Rita,God has started o!Hes almost granted my request.I appreciate ur
concern.Where u@d experience?Temite.WOW!A new reader of ma blog yet u
checkup.Mumy solosydelle LOL.I said u should pay4ma ticket u...lol im back o
thanx4checking on me.Who else?Miss luv,LG and 9jadramaqueen I'm sooo glad.
I've been away cos I needed some time2maself2concerntrate and solve some
problems.Anywais,all dat while I met loads of bloggers(kai!u guys are wonderful
and interesting characters) I'm gonna do an expose on some of them.Let me
start with.....
FUNMI IYANDA:-Well,we all know her and possibly have met her but for
me@everytime I would've met her something went wrong.There was a day she was
in my church but alas I was at home!(i dnt miss church) One bright sunny
saturday,I went out2relax and there she was by my side.I was stupefied!It was
like XSN touching Kanye west lol.My idol was a hand span away!I love her and
what she stands for.Shes definitely not 9ja's obama but shes our Rosa Park.Shes
one comely vivacious agbaya who has refused to "grow up"and become boring lol.I
see her in her80's with googles and holes in her set
of teeth making a poor attempt@dancing alanta(new ghetto dance,AJ style) to
Inyanya's(MTN project fame) hit track lol I was flabbergasted when I
realised she instantly knew my blog,mayb shes an avid reader F@*%!mayb shes
reading this.....
RAYO:-Rayo,rayo,rayo.... yeah thats her name.She comes up here acting shes quiet
and all.Dont let her deceive you o!Shes Naughty with a capital N!Shes BLACK and
BUSTY!LOL btw,please,stop
tryin2matchmake XSN n I.I'm not lookin4wifey neither is XSN(ok,i think she
is)
XSN:-shes crazy with every letter of the word.We all know her.Shes a
creature-insane plus kolo lol but really she looks sane.Her appearance is simple
and genteel.It's just that she uses so much accessories she looks like a
palm reader and she wears this wig that covers her eyes leaving her looking like
a yorkshire terrier lol I like this girl but I luv her mind.....Thats all for now
folks,feels great to be back!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

KAMIKAZE(ADJ)

I'm really sorry its taken me over a week to update plus I've not even commented on most of your blogs though I've read them.Its still because of my connection palava jare.Mz.dee,I must finally acknowledge you o(after 2weeks?),she gave me award o and me I'm also giving out the honesty award not in any particular order......

1)chari
2)buttercup
3)rita
4)theicequeen
5)sting
6)exschoolnerd
7)solomonsydelle
I'm not really following the rules please pardon me.Anywais,do you remember the ebony skinned chic and johnny bravo?I pondered within myself if I'm really scared of JB or intimidated by the girls,so I settled that by walking up to the girl(Gist later) For now,I giving out short stories and I hope you enjoy them.....
KAMIKAZE(ADJ)
"Segun.So when am I seeing you again?"With a sorrow choked tone,Victoria asked her husband a question she knew correctly the answers to.She just wished his reply would cheer her up this time around.Segun,a top marketing executive with etisalat the new GSM company that just rolled out.For the past 12 months,he has been with his family for a total of 22days having travelled all over the country leading the marketing campaign.Segun,a go getter,natural salesman(he could sell a rayban sunshades to ray charles)a synonym of success,had the target of reaching 5 million subscriber base for etsalat in the next month.Victoria on the other hand was a beautiful loving wife in her early thirties with two kids,a set of twins(a boy and a girl).She was a chorister at church who held a top spot at an advertising agency.Due to her husbands absense,shes had the gruelling task of being both father and mother.The scolder and pamperer of the kids.The disciplinary agent and the spoiler.she woke up 6am,readied the kids for school and prepared for work,drop the kids,off to work,at lunch shes gone to pick the kids at school with the driver,back to office,leave at 5pm,head to an eatery for lunch then straight home,help the kids with their assignments,go to church if there is any meeting that concerns her(if not they watch TV) then sleep by 9pm.This was what her easiest schedule was like.she had to draw energies from her body,spirit and soul to last this long.........
"Segun,I'm talking to you" but segun,engulfed,ransacking his room for his diamond studded cartier and couple of files vaguely noticed her presence let alone give her a reply.............
His silence punched her,she was dejected,her head dropped down in dismay and shoulders shrunk but being the good wife she was,Victoria reasoned her husband was almost late for his flight and needed to pack up real quick.She encouraged herself,letout a loud sigh to release some of the desperation and started towards the guestroom where she knew the exquisite cartier was.With a hand stretched out and a forced smile "here is your treasure" "No,my queen,you are my treasure"Segun interrupted.He drew close and followed up with a quick kiss to her forehead which felt rather mechanical than passionate.Instantly,hesitatingly,Victoria slipped her hands round the ignorantly insensitive male and leaned her sized 36 essence on his bear chest in a desperate attempt to capture his wondering attention.She succeeded.Atleast,he stood still for once and looked her in the eye.She searched for the words to convey her desperation but english grammar failed her.She is a full grown woman with needs,She has feelings,she needs to be touched and pampered.She didn't know how best to say it to him.She was tearing apart inside,crashing and tumbling within,she was thrown in hysteria.She squeezed him and like a dying King,she uttered powerful words in a frail tone.
"Segun,you are looking at me but not seeing me.You are hearing me but not listening to me.You are touching me but not feeling me.I'm here,you are there,my love,I'm lonely"The power of a woman.Those words stopped him more than Hancock could stop any fast moving train.
Those words tore through his strength in to his soul.The dripping of her tears sliced his heart but he only could feel the fret and desperation that culminated to those words AND NOT comprehend those words.He was confused.What was she talking about?To the best of his ability he'd been a great husband.He'd always loved her,made sure she and the twins lacked nothing,even bought her a range rover sport on her birthday.True,he usually is not around but he calls her everyday!At every idle minute he rings his other half.HE could feel the helplessness of his wife but didn't know what to do.He was sad she was sad.He tried to ponder but his mind was foggy.Slowly,segun's hands curled round the sobbing queen."It'll be alright" he muttered though he had no clue as to what really the problem was.Victoria was buried in Segun's tight yet comforting embrace,together they stood as one......................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................................................................
After bout a silence of 5seconds which seemed more like eternal bliss for Victoria.......
"Don't go"She said,as she was too afraid to say the whole sentence let alone tell him to resign which was what she really wanted to say."Don't go where?" Segun quizzed."Don't go to work"Victoria said angrily.Segun disengaged,stepped back and put his hands on her shoulder.Peering at her,he said"I know you are sad I"m leaving again but I've to work to earn money to sustain and give you and the kids a satisfying future"Victoria knew it was futile.She knew she couldn't just convince him to resign just like that except she had jazz or "touch and follow"ButSegunthetrailblazzerachieverambitiouslovingfaithfulyetinsensitiveunconciousegoistic
husbandorshouldIrathersayfatherofVictoria'schildrenkeptonrantingabouthisloveforhiswifefaith
fulnessdedicationsacrificeforhisfamilyandtriedconvincinghispathetichalfheisdoinghisbest.But
Segunfounditrelativelymoredifficultthanyoudidtoreadthissentencetoconsoleleastconvincehis
embitteredqueen.
Victoria was too buried in her sorrows she did not even hear the words escaping Segun's lips which she only saw moving.She was right there but not there.....
"Koun koun koun"There was a knock on the door.Segun opened the door of his heated room,DEmola was on the otherside of the door.Demola was a fair,interesting and pious 24year old who was their church member.He had a bosom relationship with the family and helped Victoria do alot of running arounds since Segun usually wasn't around to do them.Part of the family's kinematics depended on him.The twins were adorable,Demola loved them.He once used money meant for his Girlfriend's valentine gift to but toys for the twins.
"What are you still doing?You will miss your flight o"Demola barked.Segun dressed up and took the his stuffs."I've to go now,we'll continue when i get back.Please."Segun said to his absent wife.
An hour later,Demola drops Segun at the airport but before he goes"Demola,I got you this TAG watch,hope you like it" "Hey,thanx""By,the way when I arrive Kano I'll send some money to you so you can parol small with your chic""Correct,You are the man!""I've to run now,take care of my chrysler o,you know I love it!"........................
Hope you enjoyed your read o,it continues in the my next post.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

KEY POINTS.....

Hahaha…LOL…You wondering why I’m laughing?I really didn’t have anything to post so I just wanted to put random sturvs but I didn’t want to use “random sturvs” as the title of this post so I decided to use Key points.Key points?!Like fuel and fire the word ignited thoughts within me.There was something about the word.My cerulyum oblongata(shey I get d spelling?) began to trace memory lane then I remembered!Key points…..The mini textbook that was based on all subjects,so compact it could be sneaked into the examination hall with relative ease.Secondary school student’s best friend.The very present help in time of need.The father of expo,chips,eegun et al(examination malpractice)

Before the prevalence of corruption in the Nigerian secondary education system,very few students saw questions before the exam was written but now the reverse is the case on a kentro level…lol.Before,it was JAMB that was “jamming” students but now students don ves.JAMB has been successfully “conquered” by students malpractice schemes it is nolonger reckoned with.I met a girl who scored 277 in JAMB wanted to study medicine but did not know characteristics of living things(MR NIGER D!) Tertiary institutions now set their own admission exams.Back to key points jare,before all this key point was there.Students en masse relied on it for survival in exams but funny enough I NEVER cheated back then.If I didn’t know the answer to a question I would not ask and not copy someone else’s work.Not that I was being religious and ish but it is just my default setting(too much of soccer video games…lol)baba God set me like that not to disturb anybody during exams but if someone asked for help I would assist.It was kinda weird and I didn’t stop till I got to UNILAG.Wen my G.P dey stagger and I saw a lil neck elongation,neck twisting,voltron formation with me in the centre(this always works,exschoolnerd tell them) ma G.P go fit survive….lol,no blame me.It’s not easy to study mathematics.

Ehn ehn remember I said this post is random sturvs?Lemme start rambling.I thank you guys for your comments on the last post plus I got a single line sentence that calmed my disturbing thoughts “Life is not fair but God is good!”

Hausa is officially the most widely spoken language in west Africa!

I discovered the true identity of a blogger and I wasn’t even stalking oo…Kai,what would happen if I start stalking….lol

I’ve not done my blog rounds and updated in days cos my connection is gone plus I can’t browse on ma fone too cos it feel,smashed and broke in 2halves(flip fones ain’t ma thingy) I feel so stranded.ARghhhh!!!

There’s this chic who is feeling me and trying to get my attention but I’ve got no love lost for girls under 18 plus I hate child abuse A LOT!

But theres this chic me I’m feeling…lol.Being seeing her around,ebony skinned,cute eyes,smashing dress sense,shaped like a coke bottle and the whole nine yards but she’s often in the company of this dude that is the combination of a house boy and Jonny Bravo.Big chest(you need to see this borad chest,d guy def gyms)walks gallantly,thing legs,fading clothes,razz accent,looks unattractive e.t.c.I don’t mean to sound conceited but I hope you get my drift.The connection between this two beats me.I’d have sworn the guy is not her boyfriend but attimes you girls can be funny.So me I dey fear to walk up to the girl make JB no go blow my jaw commot(lol) but the girl’s countenance tells me “catch me if u can!”Well me I already know what I’m gonna do in my mind…..

On Sunday I visited my aunt.So we watched a movie and her daughter(16yrs I think) was present.There was a sex scene,the actors kissed and smooched then the actress started grinding on the guy as he sat,MAD GRIND! I could see uneasiness written in the air then I looked at my aunt,she looked at her daughter but the daughter pretended not to notice her.I my ribs were cracking withing.Then the actress knelt before the dude,unzipped the dude and wanted to “speak to the mic” my aunt shouted at her daughter “will you change that dial!” I was ROTFLMAO in my mind,I couldn’t hold it no more I let out a crack in split seconds.Kai,its always funny and awkward when we watch sex scenes with our parents…..Omo,this rambling don dey long b dat o,atleast I don update...

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

LIFE....FAIR???

Life,you chose me
I didn't choose you
You are not fair.

You gave me struggles
but you made him a prince
Is this fair?

I dream of fortunes
but his lot is fortunes
This is not fair!

Yet you teach me
All men are equal
You say u are fair.

But my palm are callouse from labour
But my soul breaksdown under sufferings
Life,teach me your fairness!

I woke up this morning on a reflective note.Truly blogville has been my venting spot and helps me ease emotional stress and all the drama in my head.This poem flowed out of my heart as questions I ask baba God this morning(then I realised its a poem)My friends I've seen alot in my lifetime,I know loads of peeps say this BUT I really mean I've seen alot in my lifetime.Lost ma pop at 10(1995),my family became a victim of "tradition",loads of ma pops properties was taken away from mom,the only house that they couldn't take from us which we lived in suddenly went up in smokes one unsuspecting afternoon(with no one at home and no nepa light,so err1 is asking till today,ow d 4k did it happen?now we live in rented apartment) I once died but God brought me back!I've been shot,drowned,almost assasinated(all because of popsie's stuff o cos I'm the firstborn) My dear I really cannot begin to throwdown all the drama and even if you meet me you'd never think I have gone throught all this cos I'm a jolly good fellow and love to laugh......I'm asking you,is life really fair?I still have to appreciate baba God o atleast me I still have the grace for "pursuit of happiness" but what of those born in darfur,liberia(all those war torn regions?)they die mercilessly not as a fault of their own but.....I don't know jare I'm just rambling in incoherent thoughts......Anywais,thankyou God!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

BLOGVILLADDICT!

I'm officially announcing that I'm addicted to blogville!I woke up this morning with blogville on my mind.I pick up my bible to observe bible study but my mind is drawing to charizard.I'm reading about immaculate mary,the mother of Jesus but I'm thinking of Afrobabe(LMAO,wat a contrast!) I give up on bible studyand tried closing my eyes to pray but I'm seeing Mz.dee smiling in a vision(this is no blogcrush alert o,lol!) I fought relentlessly to concerntrate on my tasks for the day but thoughts of blogville kept on flooding my heart.Finally,I succumb,neglect all i've to do,come online,plunged in to blogville and now its 2pm in the afternoon I haven't acheived anything today and I'm yet to leave blogville.
Kai!You guys are fabulous,I've found a home away from home in here ironically you guys are putting me in trouble.Some peeps think I'm going psycho and I need to visit yaba left(psychiatric home) before I totally loose it cos attimes I sit(n I knw most of us do) and imagine what meeting princesa would be like often I try to phantom the wonderment called exschoolnerd.I burst in brief laughter,people turn and ask me whats amusing me but I reply "nothing".Somebori even gave me an unsolicited description of the location of yaba left!(can u imagine?) I once asked myself "and this exschoolnerd is a human being o?" "with one head"lol.Enough mind boggling characters camp here in blogville,where do I start and stop?Is it the vivacious ladyguide or the ice cool aloofar?Is it the kolomental Afrobabe or the simple Sting?The list is infinite,you guys are so alive(you guys rock!) I wouldn't be surprised the script writer for only Joker(dark knight) is from blogville.......
Some of us are so addicted to blogville,after work and family blogville takes d rest of our time,ah ok sorry,after work,family and sex blogville takes our time(badderchic thanks for correcting me)I've been online for hours swiming the deep waters called blogville,I never knew we were this big,I'm discovering new blogs and seeking"opporunities for aggressive expansion(anoda line frm d dark knight,I'm so full of d movie...lol) There is a troubling discovery though as I "swim" and it's the fact that the number of female bloggers quadriples the male's but d koko is there are loads of responsible baby mamas and married women talking bout there home,sexuality,women talk(it sorta gives me d creep thou,lol) and constructive stuffs generally but I can't find any married man blog bout his baby girl,job,investment or men talk(lol) So I'm thinking "is it that there is something with women and blogging?"(I pray not) abi blogging is for females(lol) that would mean we the few males here are sissies since we shouldn't be blogging(lol,chari try confirm if you still be man o,make sure ur kini still works o,lol)
Finally,I've been elevated and let in a higher and inner circle of blogville so I get to hear all the inner gist and "aproko",lol but the truth is that if you just let go of your anonymity and reveal true identity nobody would gossip bout you again cos nobody gossips bout facts!
PS: I anounce with great regret I'll not be at the reunion....chari,princesa,XSN,my sista e.t.c
"I'm so so sorry"2ce
"I didnt mean to break your heart"2ce
"I'm a heartbreaker"2ce
Will-I-Am(sorry)

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

DARK KNIGHTS!!!

Mz.dee's recent post on "demonic friendship" plus the combination of previous posts from other bloggers on blogville revealed to me our ignorance or sceptimism(I'm not sure which)on the subject of witchcraft.Since on blogville we are here to interract,have fun and learn I thought it would not be a bad idea to educate us a lil on this matter.It's a sorta weird subject to illuminate but hey dont think I'm a weirdo or something plus my pop aint gandolf(Lord of the rings) and my sexymama aint a classmate of harry porter but I just want to draw some facts from the bible and present it to you with flawless logic.
1st thing I'd like to say is I think civilization,technological advancement,developments e.t.c have cast a dark shadow on the undisputable truth about the reality of darkpowers!Before the advent of the missionaries our fathers were ruled by dark powers that demanded worship(attimes asking for the blood of young virgins) plus when our ancestors fell ill their doctors were babalawos(herbalist) who would treat them using herbs and incatations and our ancestors did recover.Infact during my yoruba class in KC my teacher said witches were the doctors.They were the ones who had the diabolical powers to discern which herb to use to which ailness.This history establishes the existence of dark powers and their POTENCY!Then came the missionaries with their first aid box,medical suplies,schools,civilization and most importantly a new religion-christianity! I'm not a member of MFM but I resent it when people make fun of "DELIVERANCE".It can simple be defined as the removal of a demon from a place,person or thing in other to make that place,person or thing clean.The missionaries were the first to conduct deliverance because by introducing us to christianity and we accepting Jesus we were delivered from the idols and demons we worshipped and became children of God.
Well for those abroad I don't really know how familiar you guys are to these things but for us here in 9ja we see these dark powers at work errday!We heard of OPC members using eggs as bombs,we heard of bakkassi boys being shot and yet the bullet did not penetrate,we hear of ritual killings for blood money almost everyday and ofcos we know its not the power of God that empowers these people.The fact I'm trying to establish is that these powers are real and around us.
Finally,baba God in his infinite knowledge and wisdom told us in his word about witches,wizards,soccerrers,marine powers e.t.c so even if we doubt man lets not doubt God plus we believe in angels and the power of God,why do we find it hard to believe in demons and by the way if you think they don't have power try to read Job chapter 1 and 2 so you know how satan wiped out all he had in a day(lets not 4get he was the wealthiest in the whole of the east,so you can imagine his flock!)But we thankGod for giving us a greater power!Anywais,having said this,you the panel of judges,acurate time keeper and my fellow bloggers and viewers at home I hope I have been able to convince you and not confuse you that witches a.k.a airforce1 do exist!

PS:By the way if in any way you don't dream or you don't remember your dreams or you are alwais having sex with this particular person in your dream or you alwais find yourself in your former school,work,house in your dream or you fall from heights in your dream or you alwais misplace things in your dream or thieves or police stop you in your dream then I think you should visit the nearest MFM branch near you for deliverance......

Saturday, August 30, 2008

THERE YOU ARE!

OMG!!! I found her! It's a lie I found her,she's on facebook! "It's a true" This is an emergency post,never intended updating now but I'm chatting right now with my long lost 1st love on facebook!Mark Zukerberg ose o(thankyou) wa jeun omo o....lol....Not that I'm still in love o(God4bid!after 13years)but I've alwais wondered what became of her but to say the truth I'm feeling funny,something is stiring within......
It all started yesterday when my best friend lala told me he found dupe on facebook.This guy is in love and he wants me to be in love too(Lala,naw by force!) This guy sings D'banj's "u don make me fall in love" err minute like he's lovelife depends on it!He torments me,"you know that may be her" he alwais tells me.He teases me with anything in skirt,including "shigidi" sef....So yesterday he inquired if I wanted to know her number and stuff so I could contact her,I bluntly declined(when you know lala you know he is not that nice,he definitely just wanted me to beg for her contact cos we had tried searching for her on facebook but didnt succeed so he knew I couldnt find her but I had a better idea) I pretended not to care bout her (but ofcos I was curious bout her whereabouts) Lala left with this sinister smile on his face.Stealtily,I went to his friend list on facebook saw her pic and added her!
Today,I come online and here we both are chatting!Here are the excerpts so far....

I've been trying to remember you. I'm getting confused

7:12pmwells
im here

7:12pmdupe
maybe if you tell me tell me the names of ur siblings I will be sure about exactly who you are..
(shes couldnt recognise me I was looking different)

7:13pmwells
yeah who am I chatin wit by d way,is it tope or dupe

7:13pmdupe
dupe

7:13pmwells
hahahahaha

na lie

u see my face n u cant remember

bera recollect!

im d 1st born

7:14pmdupe
I'm sure u have changed..u can my pic too but u didn't know if it was tope or dupe

7:14pmwells
so u really wudnt remember my siblings

is dis ur pic im seein?

7:16pmdupe
the seun was close with was about my age annd all his sibling's name started with an "s"

7:18pmdupe
am i right?

7:19pmwells

word!

dang!

u r......

7:20pmdupe
i am....what?

7:21pmwells
u are right

7:21pmdupe
woooww!!!

7:21pmwells
absolutely correct

7:21pmdupe
seun is this really you?

7:21pmwells
def

7:22pmdupe
wow u have grown

7:22pmwells
SO HAV U.....lol

7:23pmdupe
if recollected correctly I had a crush on u
(my head was swelling madly here..lol)
7:23pmwells
lol

we both did

7:23pmdupe
wow i never thought we would ever talk again

7:24pmwells
really,I alwais knew we wud meet....

dis world is small

7:24pmdupe
true dat

7:24pmwells
ows u now?

wat do u do?

wat nxt

7:25pmdupe
how are ur sibling?...is it Shade? and Seyi? or Seye? I hope I'm right?

I'm fine

7:26pmwells
UR MEMORY aint bad

seyi

seye

sola

n segun

7:27pmdupe
right! ...i try oo

7:28pmwells
lol.........hahaha

7:28pmdupe
wow a lot is going through my mind right now

7:28pmwells
expected

u wud wana remember alot of stuff

emotions wud b high.....u need2see me wenever I met my old KC mates...WE GO GAGA...lol
wen I met nnamdi(u remember him?) we hugged so tight this white dude thought we were gay
7:29pmdupe
lol

i have alot of questions

7:30pmwells

ok

im all urs

7:30pmdupe
wat r u doing now?.. i mean how is life

7:30pmwells
great!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
while i hav a job waitin4me

7:31pmdupe
dat's great

maybe we can meet up when u come to canada

7:32pmOyeniyi
def

definitely

ehn ehn I think that's all for now folks,lemme return to my chat and there's this funny trend with the names of the girls I've really loved,check this out.......dupe,tope,jumoke,joke,ope and finally tope(yeah,I dated2topes) so something tells me my wife would probably have one of these names or something familiar.If we have ever "dated" and your name doesn't sound like these then I'm sorry it was a fling.Fiona,don't be crossed with me atleast you had a boyfriend when u were with me,olatero olagbegi,ehn! ehn! you can't even say jack cos I know you were creeping remember that night at the club!Ima....ahn ahn,am I chari?Why I dey give blogville chronicles of my girls,abeg bye bye jare all you amebo mongers,Jesus don even collect all this nonsense for my hand sef,PRAISE GOD!!!

PS:"fall in love" by D'banj,i'm so feeling that song.Lastweek mom was so sick she was talking bout death!Help me thank baba GOD for her recovery o,the devil is a liar!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Hey! HEY! STOP THERE! PARK! PARK! PARK!


Heard alot bout "The dark Knight" but I tried to ignore it and not see the movie but the hype was too much when it became 2nd best movie of all time after it dropped starwars so last week I decided to go see it at the cinemas.....I cant find words to contain the movie that all I'm gonna say!Joker was sicker than sick,more paranoid than paranoid.The word irrational cannot contain his irrationality!He was just a loose cannon!....Well,I n my friends left the galleria at bout 10pm n at the National Stadium in Surulere there was a checkpoint.An officer stopped us checked us out,we were all coming from the office,branched at the cinemas so were dressed in suits and looked loaded with cash plus unfortunately the guy driving had no drivers license(we didnt know!) Before we could say "jesus is lord" this guy was already begging the officer and this really pissed me off!Fisrt rule with nigerian police,never beg!It gives them a sorta pshycological edge plus when u know you are wrong dont shout at them but dont beg,just remain calm but if you are right and got all the necessary papers you can blow the lid off!
There was an all night show which I wanted to attend at Planet 1 the week they started operations and I left LUTH at about midnight in a cab for the place.When I got to ojuelegba a danfo bus filled with policemen double crossed my cab and searched us and found nothing.They checked my wallet and found 18grand(they couldn't et me go with all that money,they had to find something to nail me) Finally they said I had 2 IDs and thats illegal I'm only meant to carry an ID around so they gave me my wallet back and rushed me into their bus filled with other guys they had arrested.Me calm as ever I no send I just took 10grand out of my wallet and put it in my stockins left 8grand in my wallet.When we got to the station,Area C at ojuelegba they started interrogting all of us each man had to settle to be bailed.One dude was caught with a bag of weed,he bailed himself with 10grand.They also picked up one christian dude who started speaking in tongues "ramon sa te kore mah!koko mama chari chari o princesa escobah!"and disturbing the whole area with noise at wee hours of the night the officers just dey laugh sey "better bring money or you are not going any where"
Finally my turn reach,their DPO asked where i was going and I told them i was on my way to ma friends crib at Ikeja.I'm a UNILAG student and i've a test2moro so had to do some reading at my friend's.The guy said "all this unilag students,u sef u look like a yahoo boy,berra settle" I said oga na 8 thasand dey here and I no dey drop sheshi...Dem talk sey I go call my mama or else i go sleep cell,I said I cant call ma mom,the poor woman is a widow I cant disturb her with my qualms....officer dont think I cant sleep in the cell oo cos me I know my right!....lol(which kain right I get,does human right exist in 9ja?) The whole gist long but finally the DPO tire sey I stubbon den he said the right thing "ok,give us something for the boys" then I said ehn ehn now you are talking so I said I can only spare 1grand...He agreed and they split it amongst themselves.I left there past midnight but I boned the parol at planet 1 and returned to LUTH....
HEY! does anyone remember cuteboss?shes back in 9ja,she arrived yestenight and she called me first thing this morning and I can tell from her voice theres still a lil of me in her and i must admit from the way I answered i still like her I just dont think it will work!Remember Psquare... "no start wetin u no go finish cos u no be george finidi"

Monday, August 4, 2008

"BLACK EYED" PEAS


As I post right now,3 girls are beating up a friend of mine in his crib!I just couldn't help but laugh cos I've been warning this guy but he is really feeling like a player.Imagine 3girls coming to your crib in an interval of 30mins I couldn't help but see the end of the whole drama!Me wey I dey laugh person me sef I get my own oo...One o my female friends don make mouth to her friend about me now she agrees to meet me today but I dey run cos man no get bar.I've been lying that I've been busy all day.Kai!I just dey ves right now ... oo ooo...Mcheeew....I dey ves jor...Mcheew...Money is power oo...Kai and you guys know I'm searching for Ms.Right oo n this could be her oo...Mcheew ...ooo...Chari help me out naw...My broda 9jaleta send me some mama charlie now...ooo...Sister Nikkisab end of month just reach now help me out with some of your salary now...lol...HAH!PRINCESA you be princess help me out with some royalty..hahaha.....
Anywais,people I dream one kain impossible dream like that ooo.1st thing I remember is I was listenning to Dare Art Alade's song feat.Eldee "youngman" outside my crib next thing one Ifesinachi bus(Interstate transit bus) parked in my crib and to my utter surprise Black eyed peas stepped out!You need to have seen will-i-am,LV hat,conventional dreadlocks,polariod shades,wool jacket,leather pants plus valentino shoes but why on earth was he carrying a ghana must go bag?!!!I'm not fabricating this oo infact fergie carried a black bagco supersack!I was dead stunned!Flabbergasted,I couldn't move.They walked into my room as if its an hotel room they had booked but I intercepted fergie cos I was thinking in my mind "will you sleep in the same room with 3MEN?" Actually I wanted her to come with me to the room I was gonna sleep in....lol.....Anywais she gave me this contagiuos smile so I let her in,err1 settled and william sank into my chair so I asked what they would like.Can you believe william asked for purewater and groundnuts!!!This dream was crazy,sha I served eer1 water n gnuts,will was really muching the Gnuts(4my mind I dey think this willie willie of a boy na worri boy o,worri boy no dey carry last oo) then a thought came that I should sing to impress will and probably he would sign me...lol....I sang "big girls don't cry" If you hear the way my voice take 4kup ehn the thing be like Golem for Lord of the rings trying to sing!So I tried 'bushmeat" by soundsultan feat.2face n w4,instead of the guy listenning to my "performance" I shock as the guy sef dey sing the song,i just ves comot from hin front.My kid bro steps into the room(Yoruba boy with Igbo sense) he is surprised to find BEP in ma room he quickly goes to grab his camara,came back to take a shot of will eating Gnuts n drinking purewater....Then he announced he will go to sell the pictures to paparazzis(atleast then he would be able to buy a PS3...lol)If you see the way will chase this guy,my kid bro ran out of d room and locked us inside,will banged the door "bang!bang!bang!" but alas I woke up and it was my lil bro banging on my door........lol....
I woke up and I was wondering who I saw last that made me have this sort of dream but it was my kid bro who I often see last!I dey wonder ooo.....JEEES!....FUCKUYOR!....Na Iya Basira meat I chop as dinner 5mins b4 sleeping...Mcheeew...Iya basira he don jazz me ooo

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

REMINISCES

All you ma amebo and gbeborun friends(especially Mz.dee)I'm sorry I starved you guys of gist.It's just that nothing much has happened in my world lately.Ehn ehn,my brother and fellow chelsea fan nijaleta I don upload o!My sister Nikkisab hope you know too ves o,I don arrange show face.
Initially,I didnt know what to posr but this morning as I went through my text messages I came across one from "cute boss"(my last boo)During the whole drama I made a decision and I always wondered if it was right.It all started early July last year,we met on a website.I buzzed her,she said hi!I chated she replied.Fellas you know how it goes now,we do the probing they do the "forming".We try to form Alibaba and basket mouth,they do the laughing.She like me sorta n ask me to promise her a DATE at 7pm(online).Well she had in mind just a chat,I had in mind a virtual DATE(as if we really were in a restautrant....sey oceanview restaurant...lol)
At 7.20pm I logged in my yahoo messenger,she'd been waiting online(can't really remember how the chat went but this is a sketch)

Cuteboss: Finally you are here,where have you been?been waiting....
Wells:(I'm thinking "shit,I'm late on the 1st date,been standing her up....lol)
There was this mad traffic on the 3rd mainland bridge(trying to form real date)
CB: Men,they never say sorry,always shifting the blame!
W: Hahahaha,ok I'm deeply sorry
CB: Whatever! (Kai!if u know how much i hate when females say this to me and simultaneously roll their eyes and fling their palm)
W: (I swallowed the bitter pill) Hmmm,love your perfume.Euphoria by calvin klein.
CB: Hahahahaha,thankyou,thankyou (Dang!she understood my virtual date idea and played along)
CB: Sniff,sniff....and what perfume are you also wearing?(you 4k up,you for no ask...lol)
W: Unforgivable!(It was the shizzle then)
W: Awhh,sorry,are hose Jimmy choo's?
CB: (Blushing) Yeah!How did you know?
W: My mom's a freak(sexymama can fit like cho and gucci shoes,gorgio armani shades,fendi and DG bags,Rolex n longines)
CB: thats nice....
W: Waiter!waiter!(calling the virtual waiter....lol) Can I've a glass of red lafayette wine?what would you like CB?
CB: (Blushing,she was feeling the trips)I prefer a glass of baron de walls
W: OK.Waiter can I've the menu list?(I typed her a couple of stuff on the "virtual" menu and asked her what she would like.She opted for just desert,can't really remember its about a year ago)
W: (waiter bows and walks away.....)
CB: Laughing.....
W: (Looking in your eyes) You look beautiful.
CB: I'm wondering,what do you see in my eyes?
W: I see lil Sparkles(The virtual waiter arrives with our order)
Blah,blah,blah can't relly remember how it went down but I sha got her digits that night and gave her a call before I went to bed.My o my,her voice was d shiznit!We spoke for bout 20minutes to one hour and before you know it we were hooked!There was alot of drama then she broke up with her BF and the next thing was for me to ask her out but that was the irony of it all.I liked her ALOT and still do,she was cute and still is plus she got a mad swagga that impresses me BUT she was travelling to london in about 2weeks and I HATE long distant relationships.I don't belive in it!She sent me a text "Hope,you know I still care" It was time for me to make it official but I didnt ask her out cos she was travelling and I knew I wouldn't be going to the Uk until this year(2k8) so I thought the relationship wouldn't workout.One the morning she was leaving d country she asked me to meet her at the airport at about 7am atleast say my final goodbyes,hug and kisses but I just couldn't do it.It hurt me but I felt I was being realistic.
We still talk,she now calls me runaway husband.....lol....I still have some of her text since last year......."I think I love you" After a lil quarel she sent me this to make up"Actually,I'd prefer having you back in the pool half naked or a different setting but under the circunstances(I was in skool) I'll go with da cinema"(My fav txt...lol,all you peverts better delete your thoughts!) Anywais,dunno if I made the right decision,what do you think?

PS: I haven't recovered from the hit single from D'banj "mo gbono feli feli",he has dazzed me with another one "oloun maje o"(God4bid!) has any1 heard this jam?this guy is a bundle of talent,you can't contain him.He is high on energy!

Friday, July 4, 2008

music is my saviour

I'm telling you from the bottom of ma heart I never wanted to be involved in this music thing but somehow Mz.dee located me by fire and now I have to comply by force....lol
Rules:

1. Put Your iTunes/ music player on Shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT!!!

4. After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the meme themselves.

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?
shobedoo:freshly grounds
I guess if u say yes I'm happy with it.....whatever..lol

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
aye ole:infinity
I'm telling you this shuffle tooooo get this one.I take life easy n I'm veryyyy optimistic

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL ?
mogbono feli feli:D'banj
LMAO!!!....well,I like a pretty face with long hair plus very fiery personality

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
love in da club:Usher
lol...lai lai...love for where?lol no ooo

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
bang bang bang:Tracy chapman
Yeah,true,word!my purpose is to turn bad guys good n those I cant change,stop them before they stop me

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
kolomental:face
YEEEPA!No oo...lol...but when I make'em laff they think I'm crazy

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
redemption song:bob marley
Jeez.I dont see the correlation oo.ma pap is dead(13 yrs ago) ma mum is MAD BORN AGAIN..LOL uno MFM style

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
lady in red:........
No ooo,I'm no nympho ooo

WHAT IS 2+2?
speed of sound:coldplay
ahn ahn you this Ipod chill out naw,ow can 2plus2 equal speed of sound?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
out of my head:ashley simpson
LOL..no oo.wat wud ma beast friend be sticking in ma head for(I aint no fag!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
this is why I'm hot:MIMS
WICKED!

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
photocopy:9ice
yeah yeah yeah,u can never be like me.I'm just so versatile yet deep!

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
hussling:RICK ROSS
YEAH!!! everyday I'm hussling(3ce) I'm gonna so hussle Don Vito Carleone go fear me.I'll have my finger in every sector of the economy you can think of!DANG!

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
money maker:Ludacris
Hmmm...this Ipod no go put me for trouble ooo if my pastor see all this one...Hmmm...

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
why me:D'banj
LAi lai,you this thing u don mad my mom aint sad she had me.She loves me,she adores me!

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING ?
dance with ma father:luther vandros
Awhhh,this one is soooooooo touching.For once this thing give himself brain,I'd so love to dance with dad but he is gone but I'd definitely dance FOR my mom on my wedding.I'll n I've been practising since last year.The song will be asa's beautiful....

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
move bitch!:ludacris
NO NO NO y u dis Ipod dey fuck up,u just did something correct now u F uk again...NO ooo,infact angels go they sing halleluyah(3CE)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
money power respect:Mosdef
DANG DANG DANG! there u go again u kinda got it...money power respect....DOn vito carleone here I come!

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Iya basira:Style plus
Hmmm....no correlation really.I no dey chop4iya basira jare...

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
beautiful:James blunt
yeah,u guys are beautiful...I love you all...lala,madam peggy,tunde me,arthur,bomboi,namo,BLOGVILLE E.T.C.

WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
close to you:wande cole n Mo'hits
yeah yeah,thats reason I started blogging in the first place...I wanna know you n be close to you

I struggled to get through with this thing cos I'm not really in the mood right now.I'm travelling interstate right now n I hope u wish me safe,pray no plane crashes ooo....I tag em

exschoolnerd

Mz.dee

my sister from another mother-nikkisab

9jadramaqueen

my friend n borther,fellow chelsea fan 9jaleta

u guys when I land I go check you blog oo so berra comply!





Saturday, June 21, 2008

RANDOM VARIABLES.....



WOW!Wow.It feels great to be back on blogsville.In the last 2weeks I've been as busy as the traffic that leads to hell!I haven't touched a system in over a week let alone be online because I get home feeling so worn out n my bed just keeps calling my name "seun,seun,seun,ojuju calabar,e yoyo e yoyo".I must have missed a lot here but I'll try to catch up.Don't know what to post right now cos I'm just recovering but I'll just go ahead and fill u in with my random parols in the last 2weeks.......
1)Business......Marketing basically,try to sell a financial product to prospective buyers and in my free time I do graphic design jobs.
2)As a youth,I've been an integral player in a just completed program and project in my church.It was tasking,challenging and rough but God took control and won at the end of the day.
3)Marriage ooo!My people marriage.I'm closing in on mid twenties and me I no just send woman but the rate at which everybody is shouting marriage in my ears now is scary ooo.My best friend(lets call him lala) is saying even if I no won marry now atleast make I key one girl down so when I don ready I no go need to start searching when all the good girls would have been taken home to mama.Then "gongo so" yesterday when a prophet told me God said he should speak to me about marriage.7hours after he made that statement my uncle's wife brought her younger sister to meet me for the sole purpose of going out with her and probably eventually propose!!!Female blogvillers abeg what's your take on this issue?At what age do u guys start thinking bout marriage?At what age do u expect the guy to start getting serious and what do you advice me,should I start searching?.........
And yeah,I like slim fit shadies,between light and chocolate skinned,long hair cute face,contagious smile,born again christian,loud in lifestyle(i'm kinda laid back n conservative so i need someone to complement) got as much sense of humour as mine(very important) as a way with words(I love girls that can finish me off with good lyrics) versatile,intelligent,AMBITIOUS and just knows how to pamper me(I love to cry attimes) and tell me please,am I missing anything out in the criteria?

Monday, June 2, 2008

GAINT OF AFRICA

My godfather is a nigerian born canadian citizen who is based in canada and has lived there almost all his life.Lets call him “my eze”.Everytime we meet physically or we chat online we have heated debates about Nigeria,her problems and the way out.My eze always used harsh words that I find offensive to describe the state of Nigeria and this would eventually make me feel uncomfortable and ashamed to be called a Nigerian.My eze would say something like “It’s a jungle out there in Nigeria” “How do you guys cope?” “I always feel sad and reluctant when I have to come to Nigeria” “Nothing works!” “I’m frustrated about Nigeria” “The people in Nigeria are chickens,they ought to have rebelled against their egocentric government,take a cue from Kenya,odinga is sticking to his guns against the incumbent president” “You have no leadership,your leaders are all rogues” e.t.c….

It may sound to you my eze doesn’t give a damn about Nigeria(that’s the way I used to feel but I realized he is saying the undiluted acidic truth) far from it!He is passionate about this country.He was in charge of the campaign team of the present prime minister of Canada,he is an international trade broker and consultant to Canadian government and has connections worldwide(he once told me he was on the phone with Clinton) and he has used his connections to set up a multinational NGO africawecare they ship relief materials and freebies to African countries except Nigeria because the nigerian customs never allowed their containers out of the port for funny and flimsy excuses but they have built a borehole in Imo state.

I always thought my eze’s statements were harsh and gave us(Nigeria) a mark of 40% because of the level of “development and civilization” in Lagos and some parts of Abuja but some weeks back I traveled by road to Oyo,Osun and Yobe state,it was during this experience I realised my eze’s harsh statements are the true picture of things!Yeah,I know driving on Lagos overstretched roads with all its pot holes is like playing Mario kart or crash bandicot racing but traveling on those roads outside Lagos was a “badder” experience.I know you know most of nigeria’s problems but we in Lagos,Abuja and port harcort don’t know how alarming it is!Its more catastrophic in other states As we our convoy moved through Oyo,all I saw were 19th century structures,illiterates,dirty surroundings.We have no infrastructures in place at all in this country,Nepa offices are using generators,fire fighters don’t have water,police officers lend weapons and ammunitions to criminals,criminals even have superior firepowers to our police’s e.t.c.Do u know Yobe is so bad the governor doesn’t reside there?He comes all the way from Abuja!Those guys in Yobe are “mallams”,so illiterate,ignorant and superstitious and the wealthy northerners are feeding on their ignorance.I’m so tired of talking about Nigeria’s problems they are so numerous,where do I start where do I stop?It already wears my heart down as I type and I’m dejected cos I’m passionate about her.I feel helpless,I’m like a romeo while she is a drug addicted mentally retarded beautiful Juliet with cancer of the lungs!

I prefer to discuss the solutions and take actions!If you were president of Nigeria what would u do?Alot of people say our major problem is corruption but I say its bad leadership.Corruption is just a fallout of bad leadership.Alot of people talk in Nigeria but no actions.My questions are what have u done or doing to help build Nigeria and what are your solutions?What would you do if u were president?

Thursday, May 22, 2008

THE CHOSEN ONE


I'm so heartbroken.How could we have lost?It's so unfair those ManUtd dudes were tooooo lucky.Yeah,I agree they reared their ugly heads in the 1st half but 2nd half,extra time and the penalties were chelsea's all the way!We hit the woodwork twice,shot targets were 8(manutd) to 20(chelsea),Drogba got redcarded in the 2nd half of the extra time and it was a psychological blow to us plus it was a potential converted penalty loss!Ok,finally my Peter cech(best goalkeeper on earth) saved the penalty kick from ronaldo then it was captain Terry's turn to give us the glory then he slipped!HE FUCKEN SLIPPED!It rained and so the field was wet and he slipped,played the ball right far wide(though he sent Van der sar diving to the wrong side)
Gush!It's so unfair!My captain Terry wept like a baby.He had giving tear and blood for the match,he defended with every fibre of his muscle,attacked with his head,marked out rooney and even denied Manutd a goal with his conventional goal line clearance but with his head this time around instead of his leg!I don't know why it always happens in football,a player plays best in a match and when he gets to the penalties he messes up.Roberto Baggio,the king of the Italian squad lost his penalty against Brazil in the finals of USA94,Bechkam,england's golden boy lost his penalty against portugal in EURO2004,the examples are endless.
Then Anelka came and played the ball into the hands of Van der sar.I'm so disappointed at him,he has been benched all the while and finally he is given a chance and he couldn't justify the 16million pounds spent to buy him.......Well,in the spirit of sportsmanship and in the heart of the game I applaud Vidic he was the wall of troy the did not allow Drogba score.The match was so intense it could spark a fire and I think it was a good exercise for my body cos my heart beat and pumped blood at a rate like never before.The loss made me bow my head in heartfelt grief,I felt my eyes getting wet and my body shrunk,at that trying moment I felt Terry was my blood brother as we wept together and it made me love him more,it made me love chelsea more and now I'm even a madder,crazier and vehement fanatic of chelsea.BLUES FOR LIFE!!!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

IDIOSYNCRASY

Been very busy reading and writing exams but I decided to cool off by coming online then i discovered I've been tagged by uzezi so I guess I gotta list some of my quirks......

1)I dont know how to explain this but I like to look "roughly fresh".Lemme explain,I iron a piece of TM lewin shirt n its looking office sharp THEN i squeeze it a little so its kinda rough or I comb my hair look in the mirror n I look too "serious" then I scatter my hair....I dont know,maybe I just like to look casual....i prefer a pair of slippers to a pair of shoes

2)I'm toooooo optimistic!Thats self explanatory!No matter how bad a situation may be I'm a steven siegel that believes I'll come out of a fight without a scratch! I've been through alot!Had a "mid life crisis" at the age of 20 but now I'm out of it!Nothing do me.......

3)I love and am riveted by creativity.I'm an artiste(not by profession but in nature) and I love people,systems and organisations that do things in a way they have never been done before.From lagos beggers that beg with new lines and techniques to dbanj n nice's creative styles to scientific breakthroughs I love'em all

4)People have eating disorders but I have eating orders!I cannot eat without drinking first then I take another sip half way and then the final gulp at the end of the meal!If you serve me french,italian or chinese delicacies with all its seafoods,creams,salads,fries,pasta n tomato sauce e.t.c WHATEVER IT IS,no matter how tempting it may be to eat I'll wait till u give me water or something to drink!

5)I just dont like creepy things.A meterial that looks jelly like,animals that creep e.t.c snakes,rats....they freak me out though I ain't scared of them if I have to kill them

6)Last but not the least I'm afraid of height!

Blogsville,I've been outta touch for a while cos I'm having exams and I'm so damn busy now I tag exschoolnerd nikkisab princesa so u guys u gotta post your 6quirks......holla!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

DADDY SORRY EHN!PELE.....

Hello happy people!Now I’m so sorry it took me a long while to update my blog which I would have last week but I was as busy as the way that leads to hell plus I badly bruised my leg over the weekend and its just healing.I initially wanted to blog about my business ideas and my fraustration about the nigerian enviroment(I’m an entrepreneur,remember?) but I just finished reading a biography on Frederick Douglas(FD) and I’m moved by a wave of compassion to blog about the sorrow,tears and blood of the black slaves under their white masters.FD,born in 1818,was a slave who taught himself to read and write afterwhich he cames across many books(including the bible,works of cato,ceasar,Washington e.t.c) that made him understand that:-

1) all men are equal and God loves everyone(the whites made them believe they were a superior race)

2) slavery is not good(though there were laws in some states in the US especially in the south that legalised slavery)

3) there are some free states especially in the north e.g New York(slavery was illegal there,FD was even shocked some whites did not like slavery there and they conducted enough anti-slavery campaigns)

With this little piece of insightful information he ran away from his master(after another failed attempt which he was miraculously speared) to NY where he joined anti-slavery campaigners and from there there was no stopping him.He made friends all over America and Europe(though he was still legally a slave!)campaigned for Abraham Lincoln(cos he was also against slavery) After abe got elected,he pressured him to pass a bill into law that would legally free all slaves I America—which abe did!

Are you in the UK and you think you are suffering because you keep 3jobs?(aba!y now,u won kill urself?) you need to see what our fathers went thorugh!The book was really illuminating on the subject of slavery.According to their laws(constitutional law ooo!can u imagine!)blacks were not seen as humans but as properties.Hence,if a slve master possessed a “property” he could do ANYTHING he liked to “it”—including rape,murder e.t.c

Do you know many bastards(which were rejected) were born to this slavemasters thorugh rape but the black female could not find justice anywhere just because the law said she belonged to him

Do you know if any slave ever got rebellious or he is feeling like one superman he wants to fight for freedom he would be sent to a “slave breaker” that specialises in torture--their own kind of mosaic(Israeli SSS)

Do you know the masters allowed their slave to do enough “xtra-curricular” activities like singing,fishing,drinking to stupor e.t.c but if any dared learn to read let alone write he was flogged 39horsewhips and sold to the south where he would surely die due to HARDLABOUR in the cotton and sugar plantation!This was recurrent throughout the book,they didn’t want blacks to read,they believed if the blacks could read they would know the truth and eventually rebel.So I’m thinking to myself “Is education really that important?”

Our fathers were subjected to a lot of inhumane degradation and labour but I really cant say all that’s why yahoo boys and 419ers would tell you they are collecting back the wages for their fathers labour!Anywais 2wrongs don’t make a right sha!

Thursday, April 3, 2008

APRIL FOOL!

April fools day started in 16th century in france and began to spread like wildfire because of the joblessness of people like you(LOL).I'd like you to fill me in on the craziest april fool you ever experienced but in the meantime listen to mine.The place was panes house dormitory,King's college around 3am.Everyone was asleep except some 6 lousy boys who had april "foolish" intentions.4boys positioned themselves at the 4corners of the dormitory whiile one stood in the middle of the dorm and the last stood at the door.They all had cigarette lighters and insecticides then they switched off all the lights.They "put their lighters up",aligned it infront of the insecticides and pressed the insecticides.The product of the "chemical reaction" was a flame!Simultaenously and continously they shouted at the top of their voices "fire!fire!"
Omo,who won die,see stampeding.All I could remember was waking up,hearing everyone shouting and running,I couldn't even see anything except the flames cos my eyes were not yet cleared.We even ran into the flame cos the dude at the door of the dorm directed the flame at us as we try to run out of the dorm!It was crazy.Kai!Next thing we just heard some lousy dudes laughing out loud and saying "april fool!april fool!"
Anywais,april fool day could also have bad consequences cos attimes you deliver a message to someone and maybe the person finds it shocking or hard to believes,the dude just takes it as april fool.Lemme give ya an example,I know this yahoo boi that had perfected his scam--advance fee fraud.He promised $12,000(salary) to chess teachers who were willing to pay him $1,100 for work permit in nigeria but the bad thing is that he sent the emails to his potential maga's unknowingly on april 1.We the maga's saw the mail,they ALL did not take the mail seriously(they didn't even know it was a scam) and replied him "APRIL FOOL" and this yahoo boi had spent almost $1000 setting up the scam(you know it costs money to setup some of the scams) Another one was a snake that escaped from it boxs in a google office in NY.An alert was sent out but they all thought it was april fool!ThankGod no one got hurt!

Saturday, March 29, 2008

EASTER MONDAY---JESUS WALKS!

Yes Jesus is alive!HE died on easter Friday and resurrected on easter Sunday.KANYE WEST said “we could rap about anything except Jesus,that means guns,sex,lies,video tapes but if I talk bout God my record won’t get played!”.He was trying to say we give attention to anything except God and Jesus so I need your attention on this post.

Some peeps say there is no life after death,I want you to know man is a tripartite being—man is actually a spirit(not this body we carry around) with a soul(our mind) contained in a body(our passport to operate on earth).When our heart stops pumping blood and our body dies(our passport here on earth expires) therefore the real us(our spirit) leaves earth and has to live somewhere—that’s where life after death comes in!

So even after the physical death we still continue to live!Whether it’ll be in heaven or hell would be judged by our actions and lifestyle on earth.The heart of this post is to make us conscious of the fact we are REALLY spirits!When we realise this the next question is “do I takecare of the real me?”We wake up,have our bath(clean our body),eat(feed our body)wear clothes(cover our body)go to work to earn money(to sustain our body)have sex(give pleasures to our body)e.t.c….

Everything we do with our time here on earth is to sustain our body which is not the real us while neglecting our spirit(the real us)We are investing most in the wrong thing!The bible says “man shall not live by bread alone but by everyword that proceeds out of the mouth of God(the word of God)” This means it’s ONLY the word of God that can make our spirit live,without him our spirit is dead! And we would wind up in hell!How often do u read your bible everyday?How well do u obey God?Do you flee fornication and wordliness?Jesus is the word of God and its only through him we can live.How well do you know Jesus?……..CAN U BOAST JESUS KNOWS YOU AS A FRIEND?Don't ignore these questions,you maybe joking with hell!Jesus wants to hear from you,just talk to him…..EVERYDAY!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

KAI!....I HAVE SUFFERED!

You wouldnt believe what happened to me.....ok,feb9 was my x's birthday,feb10 was my girlfriend's birthday,feb14 was vals and as if that wasnt enoughfeb25 was my baby's birthday(his name is tommy,he is my fav lil cousin)I bought'em all gifts.My account was the beast of burden,rightnow its on red alert!I'm so broke.....as i dey now I dey humble,I just dey go jejely.I met a girl lastweek monday,we chatted,exchanged numbers n as we were bout2depart she said "ah seun,my birthday is on saturday" I interrupted "funny enough,my birthday is a day b4 yours what are you getting me?".......mchweeee.....nonsense,Amadioha fire you!God punish you!.....u don see maga abi?......lol......
I'm so broke i havent paid for my monthly internet subscription,i had to browse yesterday at a cyber cafe on my way home from school.I had a thousand naira left on me,I bought a ticket for an hour for 150naira and I collected my balance of 850naira or so I thought!As I strolled home after browsing I branched a road side kiosk to purchase a 750naira recharge card.I collected the card,loaded the credit on my phone,dipped my hand in my back pocket to pay but it was empty so I checked my wallet,alas! there was no money!(this is the part in 9ja movies where they play a soundtrack.....gen gen!.....)
I said to myself "seun,you have torn your shirt"(its a slang of mine meaning seun you have fucked up!) The woman saw my countenance and knew I had no money,she just quietly stood up,bentdown,picked up a stick on the road,sat down and began to caress the stick!(its was a sinister move that told me "I'll break your head if you tell me any story".......KAI! I suffered,I really dont know how to finish the story but I believe you have an idea............

Sunday, January 13, 2008

MIKEL OBI-ASA?


Do we remember the controversy that surrounded the signing of Nigeria’s soccer prodigy John Mikel Obi?Mikel was initially signed to Man.utd before Chelsea finally bought him for a whopping 16million pounds.There was a dispute to who actually owned him,he had 2 different jerseys for 2 different clubs,for a couple of months Mikel was missing-he was not in the country neither was he at his norwegian club,there was an unsettled dust in the minds of nigerians!The same way I feel right now has I hold in my hands 2 different recently released albums of Asa,with literarily the same songs on both but released under 2 different record labels-kevin lucciano’s questionmark records and Iyke da don entertainment.
Asa’s former record label is questionmark but word on the street is Streetmonks,D’accord,Asa e.t.c have a feud with Kevin because his management did not fulfill some parts of their contract so they all left questionmark and created their own management to promote their works.When Asa was asked on hiptv what ensured between her and questionmark,“Asa the pacifist” said her contract with questionmark has lapsed(I knew she was lying…lol)Anyways I believe the album themed Asa released under Iyke da don entertainment is her authorized album while questionmark’s was illegally released by Kevin to sabotage the sales of Asa and probably to make money out of it(that’s my opinion ooo or what do you think?)
I know D’banj is original,creative,high on adrelalin,stylish,sexy and probably your favorite Nigerian artiste but I must say Asa is my favorite.Finally we have a contemporary Nigerian artiste who is leaving the cocoon of hip hop and RnB into a foray of another genre of music!Finally we have someone so natural,whose lyrics are edifying and thought provoking(most artiste want to look gangster and are making tracks about parties,shaking booties and money,aren’t they tired?) Asa whose real name is Bukola Elemide and producer is Cobhams Asuquo(my roommate in King’s College) is deep,spiritual and richly talented….gushh I love her guitar!She plays what I call local rock and her 11 tracker album is the next best thing after Craig David’s born to do it(I’m yet to skip a track while listening to her album)Word on the street is her album is making impressive sales,at the store where I bought her album they had just 2 copies left whereas Psquare’s gameover was still about 16 in number left on the shelf.I just hope the profits reflects in her account somehow!

Sunday, January 6, 2008

ME,MYSELF AND I

Ladies and gentlemen,welcome to my first of a seasonal series of blogs which will mirror my adolescence and the rest of my youth(maybe by the time I’m 60 I would have lost all tangible trace of youth and vigour,so till then….enjoy my blog).Allow me to introduce me.I’m all that you read about in that lil description box you see on the left with the picture of Denzel Washington on top!(you wish) But before I became “the prince” I was a “frog a damsel had to kiss”,so let me introduce you to the na├»ve,gawky,wobble,inferiority complexed Mr nobody I was!
Inherently I possess a deep and emotional soul,liberal and versatile views and interest ranging from arts and culture to science and technology,ice man age to the age of the 5th generation computers,an inspiring ambitious(emphasis on the ambitious) innovative introvert(emphasis also on the introvert) yet I crave self expression,a fabulous social status(what a paradox!) and I love adventures.I once trekked for a tiring 3HOURS 30MINUTES from my school King’s College Annex on the Island through Carter and Eko bridge to my crib in Surulere not because I didn’t have a driver to come pick me up in school but because I hungered to do something “different” and crazily sick.Talking about adventures,I robbed a top Nigerian bank(name withheld) without a gun,as a matter of fact without any weapon or accomplice whatsoever!I know it sounds too good to be true,mo de mope e kola-I know u don’t have tribal marks(a Yoruba slang for not being gullible)but I did do it twice!TWICE!(you need to know all the evil ingenuity,caution and perfection it entailed but its a story for another day)I’m not proud of the “feat” but that was a moment in my life when I had lost all sense of dignity and pride,”lived on the fast lane” and I just wanted to display my creativity and feed my “Christopher Columbus” spirit on conquests albeit the conduit was erroneous and perilous and I deeply regret ever doing that(I have resolved in my heart to return the same amount of money I stole from the bank one way or the other when I have that kind of money-I know you think I’m nuts!)
Despite all my inherent capabilities and adrelanin rushing through me I had difficulty expressing myself –With all my ambition to hold the 1st position in my class I never was amongst the first 40students(out of 100) throughout secondary school,with all the vivacious spirit in me seeking an outlet through adventure I never had the guts to ask a girl out!I was a KC boy who never had a QC chic.GUshhh!can u imagine!(my head needs to be washed by a prophet) I was dead shy,lacked social and human relation skills,suffered grossly from low self esteem,KAI!My psyche was battered by inferiority complex,I walked with my head down and followed the crowd.Don’t let me bore you with my pathetic past,its just I believed so much in me yet “me” was not anything to be proud of.I reflect on my adolescence and there’s nothing to brag of except I never ever engaged in examination malpractice and I was a member of one of the socialite cliques in my set who always stood up for me(Nnamdi,Abebe,Bogus,Tobi,Obeef,Madam peggy you guys rock!)asides that,nothing crazy kool,vivacious,grand or achievement of enviable standards.
But the only reason I like my past(which I think surpasses every reason I shouldn’t ) is by the time I “arrive” I would have proven like Abraham Lincoln that one’s ugly and feeble past has little or no hold on one’s success.My story will again establish the golden words “champions are made not born.”I would have proven to myself that man can reinvent himself.The simple command written on the temple of Apollo in Delphi ,Greece-“Know thyself” has been my watchword.for the past 3years I have engaged in transformation and a journey of self discovery which has been fun,fulfilling,insightful and adventurous.I would like to water your appetite and quicken your curiosity by not telling you what I have reinvented myself into but has you continually read my blogs an image of the new me would permeate your beautiful minds.Once again ladies and gentlemen you are welcome to my world,hope you enjoyed your read.